Choices..

Life is made up of choices, what we wear, where we go, how we live and who our friends are. There are so many things that we choose in our daily life of which we don’t realise, others so big that they can change the person we are. It seems that there are times in our lives where our choices seem so daunting, frustrating and just hard. These choices are defining, shaping and even changing the people that we thought we were. The more I type I can’t help but wonder; are the choices we make defining our destiny and furthermore, are there choices in life at which we don’t really get to make?

I’ve been working in the new role now for 7 months, which is awesome. It’s a role full of challenges, changes and some great people who I have come to really enjoy. It comes back to my choice to look at something different. I was working in Sales where my life was monotonous, day in day out I was coming in, making some calls, closing some sales and leaving. I had to make a choice, i needed a change. Luckily for me I was able to gain this role and really sink my teeth into it. I’ve chosen to work hard, learn as much as I can and really show people what I can do. I am in a period where I am working on getting myself into a position where I am able choose something else, move up in the world and really shine.

I’ve been thinking about some of the choices I’ve made in the past, where I live, who I know and what I have done with my life. I’ve reflected on these choices, some good, some bad and some that are still being decided. I’m living in Melbourne, I have somewhat of a life here and although there are many ups and downs, all in all I’m doing what I think, a good job. Of late things have definitely evolved, ruts form and motivation dies and sometimes it’s a struggle to get myself up and motivated to do the things I really want to do. It’s about finding that spark, that something inside which really lights that fire and gets me out of my seat. I’m getting there, working on the embers to try and increase the flame, it’s about choice, and sticking to that choice like there was no other option.

Sometimes our choices are made for us, relationships end and although we would choose differently, we don’t have the option. My relationship came to an end a few months ago and although I made my choice around wanting to do what it takes to make it work, it wasn’t reciprocated and in the end, fizzled out to nothing. After the dissolution of the relationship there was yet another choice, should salvation of the friendship continue or is it just better to let go and to be honest forget it ever happened. Once again I didn’t get that choice, it was made for me and no matter how much pain, stress and hardship that caused, I had to change the thinking and make another choice, just let go.

With all the change happening in my life I really had to look further into myself in order to survive. Choices were hard, they were nasty and it came down to me as to how I was going to come out the other side. As you all know I am the type of person to be driven by emotions, carried away with them really and that has been my downfall in many of life's situations. With the help of my sister I was able to work on thinking logically, rationalise and really look at what my ‘happy ending’ is. It hasn’t been easy to change this mindset, to make decisions based on logic and not what my emotions are bursting to do. In the end I took the high road, really managed to think about choices in a different way and to be honest I came out the other side a better, more developed person that anyone would believe.

Picturing our happy ending is the easy part. Knowing what we want out of life is seems quite simple compared to what we have to do to get there. Our choices in life really have a detrimental impact on whether or not we’ll actually get there. I found that by working backwards really helped making the logical decisions and things started to become easier. Asking myself whether the choice I make is going to help me get there was the saviour, I was able to think about the outcome of those actions and start to think about the consequences rather than just diving in and having to pick up the pieces.

I guess at the end of the day we are all working towards our happy ending, we make choices at times where we really aren’t thinking about the future and getting to that ending. It’s amazing how many times we make decisions in the spur of the moment, fuelled by emotion without really thinking things through. Many can vouch for me in saying that that was me, a picture of emotion which had the driving seat in my life and made things so much harder to handle. It ruled me, took over and stopped me from actually living and enjoying the moments in life.

Some choices are ours to make and quite a few aren’t. What we need to do is really nut out exactly what our happy ending is. Once you know that, working backwards and basing your choices on whether or not it’s helping to get there makes them easier to handle. It works in all aspects of life, sometimes we do need the emotions in order to make the best ones for us, it’s just a matter of whether or not those emotions are controlling everything and logic goes out the window.

I know that from now on that’s my approach, I know what I want and where I want to be, so why would I make a choice that’s going to take me farther from it. Ask yourself, how many times throughout your life have choices you made taken you further away from what you really want, even if some are made for us, it really opens up another where we ultimately choose how we come out the other side.

Mik